Don’t Hate Your Neighbor!

“Don’t find fault. Find a remedy.”

―Henry Ford

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Do you know God’s first word of advice on how to be a good neighbor? 

His first instruction is: Don’t hate your neighbor. (Leviticus 19:17)

I didn’t see that coming!  I was thinking that maybe the first step would be something more in line with baking some homemade chocolate chip cookies and walking over and knocking on the front door and introducing yourself and giving them the fresh baked cookies and exchanging a few niceties about the weather and how nice their yard looks. 

But God cuts to the chase and gets right to the bottom line: people are broken, willful, and self-centered and are usually difficult to live with – especially when they’re next door!

Of course reaching the I-hate-you stage doesn’t happen overnight.  You don’t go to bed one night okay with your neighbor and get up the next morning hating them.  Reaching the hatred level, like a violent summer thunderstorm that suddenly breaks out, is a slow gradual process that only culminates with that big clap of I-hate-you thunder. 

It’s the slow accumulation of little things…

• Your neighbor has dogs that bark – a lot. 

• Your neighbor’s strategy for removing his autumn leaves from his yard is letting the wind blow them over into your yard.

• Your neighbor’s house looks like something off a “fixer up” reality television show, except they decided not to fixer ‘er up.  And you can hear the calculation running in your mind every time you pull into your driveway of the real estate values going down in your neighborhood because of your sorry, no-good neighbor.

The list of complaints keep growing, for once you see one thing, you start looking for another reason to be offended.  Resentment builds until about three years in of raking up your neighbor’s leaves and having his dog bark at you every time you step into your yard your face starts twitching at the thought of your neighbor.  And then one morning you wake up, and without really thinking about it, you’ve slipped over into the I-hate-you stage.

And here’s another thing about your neighbor: The word neighbor is fluid.  (You can thank Jesus for this.)  Turns out your neighbor doesn’t have to share the same street with you.  It can be the guy next door but it can also be that foreign looking chap down at the corner store or even that boss-from-hell you have to put up with at work.   

And here’s the deal, you can’t hate them. 

Now why would God command something like that? 

After all, you are a decent person.  You don’t go around hating people—or do you?  Turns out there’s a reason God instructs us to not hate our neighbor; God knew that neighbors are prone to be hateable!

Neighbors are broken, messed up, and sinful people with issues and problems that spill over into our lives.  Most of them are not deliberately trying to be difficult, but most of them are consumed with their own lives.  They’re selfish, self-centered, and honestly, making you happy is not that high on their priority list.    

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Several years ago, I remember a new neighbor who moved in to the house beside where I lived at the time.  Life was busy and I kept postponing going next door with the chocolate chip cookies.  One day the doorbell rang and I went to the door and there was a strange man standing at my door with a scowl on his face and a leash in his hand attached to my dog(!)

Turns out he was my new neighbor.  He growled (not my dog, my neighbor), “Here’s your dog.  The next time he runs through my yard I’m calling the police.”  And with nary a fare-you-well he turned around and stiffly walked back over to his house. 

To be honest, my dog did have a habit of digging under my backyard fence.  I kept meaning to come up with a solution to this problem but I was so busy and I just never found that “get around to it” button.  Without meaning to, I became that neighbor!

Thankfully I bit my tongue that day and didn’t respond in like matter.  Instead, I determined to somehow win that neighbor over.  And little by little I did.  The short of the story was that my neighbor was a secular Jew and atheist and very resistant to the idea of God and faith.  But before it was all over, I had several chances to talk to him about God and eternity and especially about his Messiah who had died on the Cross for him.

He died a few years after that first encounter at my front door.  Honestly, I don’t know if he ever surrendered his life to Jesus, but I do know he at least had a chance because he had heard the Gospel.

Remember, it was God who instructed us to not hate our neighbor.  There’s more on the line than a rude neighbor who lets his leaves blow over into our yard or who lets his dog run free in the neighborhood.   

All of us are heading to that final day when we depart this world and stand before our Creator to give an account of the life He gave us.  As a good neighbor, let’s do our part in making sure that all those we meet will at least have a better chance of being prepared for that Day.

The ONE THING for today: Don’t hate your neighbor! 

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I couldn’t resist…