Perhaps the most shame-associated verse in the Bible… (Part 1)

• 1 Timothy 3:2-7 (NKJV) A bishop then must be…one who rules his own house well, having his children in submission with all reverence (for if a man does not know how to rule his own house, how will he take care of the church of God?)…

In the parsonage and the pew, there is probably as much guilt associated with this verse as with any verse in the Bible. This verse has caused much pain and shame for preachers and their parishioner.

I’ve even known of pastors who resigned their church and left the ministry because they felt that had failed in this area. And I’ve known of good people who stopped attending church because of the embarrassment and shame they felt because they considered themselves a failure as a spouse or parent.

Nevertheless, the inspired command is there, so what are we to do with it?

First, notice that we are to rule our own homes “well” – not perfectly. There has never been a perfect husband/wife or father/mother.

The word “rule” should be understood in terms of management. The very fact that something needs managing implies imperfection. Sometimes managing a household is like herding cats – the best you can do is provide “damage control.”

Just yesterday I was up very early and so I took a short nap before heading out for the day. When I went to bed the house was in perfect order. When I awoke the house was completely different. The entry ways into the den and kitchen were barricaded, the Christmas tree was barricaded, the floor was littered with toys…need I go on?

What made the difference? Answer: Annie E.

And yet I’d trade all the tea in China for that little girl. Managing is worth it when you love that which you manage, and there’s no business like family business when it comes to management.

We’ll dig a little deeper on this theme tomorrow, but for today let me leave you with this prayer: “Father God, thank you for my family. Please give me the wisdom and strength to lead well and please – in your mercy and grace – cover for my failures and the failures of my dearly loved ones and eventually get us all home to You. In Jesus’ name, amen.”